I Need My Blues.

I don't mean Blues as in music genre; I meant my alone-ness, my solitude.

True.  While in Manila, the ever presence of relatives and friends and the many places and eateries to go to may divert one's attention from the Self. But the longing for solitude, that precious time with one's inner soul lingers on.

I need time alone.  When I can just relax and read and think.

When I was new in Ohio, some younger folks thought I was aloof (anti-social was the word some used). But I was just a new guy in town and the eerie silence of a small Midwest town was deafening and ironic as it was, I was looking for the homegrown night action and gigs, and the "loudness and craziness" of Manila. The HotDogs song Manila  "hinahanap hanap kita Manila, ang ingay mong masakit sa tenga," rang true.

But those many years living in the US and then in Canada inevitably dug into the system. And then, there was my latent sadness and seeking for alone-ness which meant peace and happiness to me. 

I need my blues.  I need to dream.