But she was not correct in assuming that my "loneliness" brings me unhappiness. On the contrary, my sadness and want for solitude give me breathing space and ultimately regenerate my systems.
I am not depressed. I am just naturally more at peace communing with the Self.
But the seeking of inner communion doesn't mean I abhor external communication. It is just a matter of choosing the company I go out with.
I love to dance and listen to good music. I drink occasionally. I love good movies. I read quite a bit now. And I write for my own pleasure. These are my joys.
When I was still in school and it was time for exams, I would cram and think of the "after exams" scenario, and I would perk up instantly.
So no matter how difficult and grave the situation is, I always tell myself of the "after."
It lessens the worry; it makes for survival.
I think that's what hope is all about. When you can look into the 'morrow, and to the future.
That means you look forward. And are not afraid to look back.
Sometimes you look back because there were unfinished business left and opportunities which you somehow missed. Another time, you tell yourself.
You move on. You come back.
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